The key takeaway is that, while the DSM-5 describes restricted and repetitive behaviors as potentially “abnormal or socially unacceptable,” we view these behaviors through a different lens. Rather than treating them solely as behaviors to be reduced or changed, we see them as opportunities to build rapport, strengthen connection, and better understand what is meaningful and important to the individual. This perspective allows us to meet individuals where they are while creating opportunities to expand their experiences, support their autonomy, and explore new perspectives in a respectful and meaningful way.
Rejecting Forced Compliance: Therapists move away from demanding blind obedience or forcing children to sit still just to blend in.
Honoring Assent: Practitioners respect a client's right to say "no" or withdraw consent during activities. (Assent means active agreement or willingness to participate.) Saying "no" is an absolutely fundamental right and an important skill for children to learn.
Accepting Stimming: Self-regulatory behaviors like hand-flapping or rocking (stimming) are allowed and protected, not suppressed, as long as they are safe. You are free to be you!
Supporting All Communication: Alternative communication methods—such as picture boards, sign language, or speech devices—are fully respected and valued.
Sensory Accommodations: Environments are adjusted with lower lighting or quiet spaces to prevent sensory overload, rather than forcing a child to tolerate distressing environments. In addition, we can add items to the environment to assist like sound reducing headphones, sunglasses, weighted blankets, or whatever accommodation is needed; this can be highly individualized.
When we take the time to understand the purpose and value these behaviors may hold for someone, we can create opportunities to connect with their interests, support their autonomy, and gently introduce new experiences and perspectives. This shifts the focus from changing an individual to creating meaningful opportunities for growth, connection, and participation while respecting who they
are.
If you would like to read more, check out this article from the The Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry